Keep Out of Reach of Middle Aged Men In Flip-Flops

I have one of those electric double strand jobs that can take out a small sapling.

Or half my left big toenail.

The One Where You Realize I Don’t Agree With Your Politics

There’s a lively (and by lively, I mean the usual, “I’m right and you have the IQ of a banana slug”) debate dusted up by today’s cartoon over at gocomics.com.

In the comments, Darkeforce has my back:

Sorry, but the Second Amendment is meant only to legalize State Militias. You’ll note two things; the first phrase of the Amendment — the most important part of the Amendment, “A well maintained and regulated militia being essential to national defense,”
You should also note that no where in the Second Amendment does it say that people should be allowed to OWN guns. Carry and keep, yes, but own, no. If personal ownership of the guns, don’t you think that the Founding Fathers would have mentioned that? Guns are meant to belong to the militia, not the militia members. The Second Amendment mandates that each community have an armoury, and guarantees the citizens’ rights to access that armoury at times when the community is at risk from enemies (not cat burglars!)

And trustedmechanic goes on to add:

If you visit the archives.gov website and pull up the Bill of Rights you will clearly see that Amendment II states “…the people…” as in plural as in society, not individuals. In the Amendment V it is clearly stated singular and meaning individual and in, “No person…” Amendment IV states, “The right of the people to be secure in their persons,” again the plural as in society shall be secure in their persons, granted a plural of their individual person. If the Founding Father’s meant the words to be interchangeable a you think, why did they deliberately word the Amendments to The Bill of Rights as carefully as they did?

Despite what I think was made clear by the Founding Fathers, the Supreme Court has many times held that the 2nd Amendment allows for individuals to own guns.  And I suppose they’ve done this for practical reasons like hunting for food to feed your family (in earlier times).  And I’m okay with that.  The Supreme Court should interpret the constitution.  If the majority of the Court really were the strict constructionists they claim to be, they wouldn’t allow anyone to own a gun for any reason other than for use in a militia.

Look, the 2nd Amendment, like the rest of the Constitution is open to interpretation.  There are many contradictions between what the Constitution says and how it can be practically applied to a modern, fast changing society.  That’s okay.  It’s not simple.  It’s complicated and difficult.  And well meaning people will disagree.  Democracy is messy.

So, for those of you who are realizing for the first time that I don’t agree with your politics, please don’t take it out on RJ, Verne and Hammy.   You enjoyed them before you knew I was a boring middle-of-the-road moderate’s moderate.  And you will enjoy them after.

I promise.

To check out the RJ Gets Shot storyline from 1999 referenced in today’s comic click here.

The Right to Bare Arms

What I’ve never understood about the arguments over gun control is why we have the right to bear some arms and not others.  We can’t own a Howitzer or a bazooka or grenades.  We can’t own C4 or claymore mines or a flame thrower.

We allow our government to prohibit some weapons which are obviously ridiculous for an individual to own, but we won’t regulate hand guns or even limit the size of a clip.   Don’t get me started on instituting real  background checks.

Full disclosure:  I don’t own a gun.  I’m not a hunter (though I have nothing against hunting).   I’ve  just never seen a need to own a gun – for personal protection or otherwise.   I’ve shot guns many times.   In fact, I can strip and reassemble an M14 in the dark (thank you ROTC).

I don’t hate guns.  I do hate an illogical, irrational gun policy that protects the rights of gun owners over gun victims.

I’m with Hammy.  I’m really confused.

RJ: Do Not Blink For Me

In the event of an end of sight situation, RJ has a strict DNB policy.

A life where he can’t blink on his own is,  clearly for RJ,  not a life worth seeing.

 

There’s No Such Thing as a Hammy Proof Lock

This is a strong rerun week.  I just wrote it a year ago, but it feels like it was written by a different person.  Someone younger, handsomer and with WAY more brain cells.

No one tells you that getting older may start as a gentle slide, but it soon accelerates into a 90 degree free fall into the abyss.  Fortunately,  it’s a long free fall to the bottom.  So long, you forget you’re falling and you eventually relax and enjoy the ride. And before you know it you forget…

…that you just lost 14,768 more brain cells while writing this.

Sigh.

A Fond Farewell to United Media

This week is a re-run week due to the fact T and I missed a deadline amid the transition from United Features Syndicate to Universal Press Syndicate.   For those of you out of the loop (which is pretty much everybody),  my syndicate of the last 17 years has gone out of business.   Over the Hedge, as well as the rest of United’s line up has moved to Universal Press.

This was not a surprise.   Syndicating newspaper features is a dying business.   Fewer and fewer people are reading newspapers, which means fewer and fewer ads, which means less and less money for the necessities of life like comics.  And the digital side is not picking up the slack.

This is one reason why I started RingTales with my partner Jim Cox.  Animated comics seem like they might have a future. We’ve had over 260 million views of over 1000 of our short (30 seconds), animated comics since March 2007.

I enjoyed working with United.  They took on two of my strips (Committed and Over the Hedge) in two years back in 1994 and 1995.   Committed was a modest success and spawned a prime time animated series back in 2001.  I ended it in early 2006 when the Over the Hedge movie came out.   United worked with me to help get both of the projects made.   They were flexible and accommodating when they didn’t need to be.   And I will always appreciate that.

I had the pleasure of working with some great editors and management at United.   Diana Lovey, Amy Lago, Lisa Wilson, Mary Anne Grimes,  Reed Jackson,  Doug Stern and the late Sid Goldberg all helped realize the potential of my work.   There were some rough times, especially in the beginning, when I was often a pain in the ass.   But over the years (especially now that I’m a producer of sorts with RingTales) I’ve come to appreciate the difficulty of their jobs.  It’s hard to be a cheerleader for a struggling team.   Or a successful team, that’s never satisfied and always wants to improve.

So, lift a glass, or five or six, to the fine folks at United Media.  Best of luck in landing safely and successfully.  I hope they all, like I have at times, come to appreciate that when you stop banging your head against a wall it tends to stop hurting.

Cheers!

 

Who Shot RJ?

Again, apologies for the delay in posting these.  Here’s the Verne Shot RJ story line from 1999.   Interesting changes in character design since then.  Also, interesting fact…  T submitted this series for a Pulitzer in Editorial Cartooning.

Enjoy.

Furry Zombies

Zombies are funny.  They just are.  Hard to take a zombie seriously, no matter how much he wants to eat your brains. You see a zombie coming toward you in Starbucks, eyes glazed over like Ben Rothlisberger at a sorority mixer, arms outstretched grasping for a synaptic snack and you think, “Really?  REALLY?!”  

You easily side-step him (zombies have poor motor skills) and then blow his head off with the grenade launcher you got a carry permit for just last week (don’t mess with Texas).   It’s then that you realize that was no zombie.  That was Ken from the cubicle next door and he just hadn’t had his Chai Tea yet.  

Oops.