Top 5 Uses For a Squid Spleen

5.  Good Source of Vitamin A in case you have Night Blindness or have a real hard time swallowing pills.

4.  Cat nip for Vampires.

3.  In many cultures the gift of a dried squid spleen is considered a proposal of plural marriage.

2.  When Popeye would run out of spinach, he’d substitute with squid spleens.  If he couldn’t find any HGH.

1.  Since squid spleens don’t really exist, their only real use is as a mildly amusing alliterative gag in modestly successful comic strips featuring an OCD turtle.

The One Where We Sacrifice History For a Joke

Yeah, I got it wrong.  In colonial America witches floated.  Non witches  sunk… and mostly drowned (which tended to shut down on the counter suits for slander).  But Verne can’t sink, so I purposefully (I swear in retrospect) fudged history for the sake of a gag.

It’s my comic strip and I’ll make stuff up if I want to.

The Wisdom of Squirrels

There is no tooth decay in heaven.   Or belly-button lint.   Or beer.

There is, however, ice cream.

Fat-free.

You.  Not the ice cream.