Peace Out

You better watch out.
You better not cry.
You better not pout.
I’m telling you why.
Electric Q-Tips will drill straight through and out your other ear if you’re not careful.

You’ve been warned.

Christmas is Cancelled, Long Live Hanukkah

Not sure what’s going on with those purple squiggles. I don’t think T colors the dailies. I think it’s done by someone at the syndicate. Someone with a four year old and a box of Crayolas.

Some day we’ll get a handle on this operation.

Some day.

Hammy’s Hugging Santa Claus

Merry Christmas from everyone at Over the Hedge:

Myself, T Lewis (no period, don’t ask me why), the entire Latvian child labor force (God bless their tiny hands, God bless them everyone one), our crack Thailand research team (where internet search costs are lower) and of course, all the little people who make Over the Hedge possible (you know who you are and if you don’t, ask the little person next to you).

And a Happy New Year!*

*except in Latvia where all new years are really just okay.

Every Day Is Hammyday

Those are special winter butterflies.   They can survive because they have an anti-freeze component in their blood that keeps them from freezing. It’s certainly not because I forgot it was winter when I wrote it and now that it’s published I have to cover my ass with some writerly back-story bullshit I just made it off the top of my head.

Really.

The Ghost of Christmas Punch Lines

Top Ten Christmas Ghosts

10.  The Ghost of Christmas Who Told Santa to Bring Your Four-year-old Cymbals for Christmas.

9.  The Ghost of Christmas Open Presents at 5:00 AM

8.  The Ghost of Christmas Undercooked Turkey Filled with Salmonella.

7.  The Ghost of Christmas You’re Out of Cigarettes and Booze and All the Stores are Closed.

6.  The Ghost of Christmas Forgot the Batteries

5.  The Ghost of Christmas Instructions in Latvian.

4. The Ghost of Christmas Lingerie For Wife in Mother-in-Law’s Stocking

3. The Ghost of Christmas Bored Children Ten Minutes After Opening Presents.

2. The Ghost of Christmas Expectations That Are Never Met No Matter How Hard You Try.

1.  The Ghost of Christmas Hell