Tag Archives: loser

Butterflies are Free and Loud

Hedge062319Don’t mess with butterflies.


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Hedge052419Snakes are so needy.

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In the Matrix Trump Doesn’t Exist

oh161010I wrote this a couple weeks ago. Sometimes the timing works out. As I’ve said many times, Trump doesn’t want to be President and he proved it last night by once again doubling down on his base. He will lose. Probably by a landslide.

Thank goodness.

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How to Deal with a Bully

oh160314How do you punch Donald Trump in the face without, you know, actually punching him in the face?

I’m open to ideas.

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Eleventy Seventy Over Twelveteen

oh160201Yes, Verne said the odds backwards. Should be 1 in 250 million. They told me there’d be no math in cartooning. They lied.

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Obsessive Compulsive Loser Disorder

Over the Hedge

Apropos of nothing, I heard a funny joke yesterday from Billy Bob Thornton on Kevin Pollak’s Chat Show podcast yesterday.  Billy Boy attributed the joke to director Billy Wilder (Some Like It Hot), who upon receiving a life time achievement award from the Producers Guild said…

“I went to the doctor the other day.  I said, ‘Doctor, I can’t pee.’  The doctor asked how old I was.  I said, ‘I’m 94.’  The doctor replied, ‘You’ve peed enough.’

That’s pretty damn funny.

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The Road to Losertown

Vodpod videos no longer available.

This is a video I did for my friend Jeff Barton who ran and lost for Hays County Judge here in Texas.   It’s one of those things that seems like a great idea until you’re up at 3 in morning for days on end trying to get it done.  I kid.

Sort of.

It’s very inside baseball.  So here’s some backstory bullet points for those of you not fortunate enough to follow the internecine affairs of Hays Country politics

Jeff comes from a politically progressive family.

His dad is a former State Representative.

His mom is a Jungian psychologist.

His son just got back from a semester abroad in Argentina.

His daughter pole vaults.

During the campaign a smear was floated by the opposition that Jeff was estranged from his sister.

Jeff does not have a sister.

Jeff was fired as editor of the Baylor Lariat in 1980 when Playboy came to shoot nude photos of coeds.

Jeff isn’t a furry.  But then again, how well do we really know our friends.

Jeff ran for Country Commissioner against the reincarnation of Edith Hamilton.   Really.

Jeff was defeated this November along with every opposed Democrat (new or incumbent) in Hays County due to Republican straight party voting.

Jeff’s campaign slogan was:  Building Bridges.

Jeff’s a great guy with a great family and I’m honored to be his friend.

And yes, I owe Jeff money.


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